Friday, May 10, 2019

Mothers, Daughters, and Mother's Day!

In two days it will be Mother's Day 2019.  As I sit here on the Friday Eve before Mother's Day weekend and watch out the window as the rain drizzles in my front yard, I am transported back to the earliest Mother's Days I can remember with my mom.  Somewhere around the time I was maybe 8 or 9, my parents joined a local fish and game club.  They quickly made friends with many people and began to search for a building lot to build a camp on the pond where the clubhouse was located.  Entertainment in those days involved dinners and dances at the club, as well as, friends with already built camps, inviting families over for cook outs and fun weekend times.  On Mother's Day all of the men would be in charge of cooking for their wives. I can remember one time when dads all gave their wives a red rose.  It was always chilly and drizzling.  My mom was so happy on those days.  I can still see the smile on her face.  Eventually we built our own camp on the pond and spent weekends and summers with the friends that my parents had made. 

By the time I turned 15, my parents were looking at selling the camp and building their dream home.  They found a building lot and built a large gambrel with a two car garage.  They sold the tiny house we lived in with no cellar and no attic, as well as, the camp, and we moved into their dream home a few miles from the pond.  At the age of 16, I took over Mother's Day for my mom.  I tried to make the holiday special for her because I knew she deserved it.  She was my mom after all!  However, I could barely cook but I tried to make her breakfast in bed each Mother's Day. She would cook our dinner then I would clean up the dishes. 

When it came to the gifts, I never quite seemed to pick out the right gifts for my mom.  I really feel she was always disappointed but maybe she wasn't. The year I got married, at the age of 20, I started to cook for her. Meals weren't the best and I am not sure the gifts were that great, but I tried.  I remember trying to pick out jewelry and sometimes clothes.  I mostly remember gift certificates and sometimes flowers. 
Mom on Mother's Day around 1998??
As my children grew up, I still had everyone over for Mother's Day.  I made dinner for my mom, as well as, my whole family.  Being together has always been a real gift for me and cooking for everyone has always been a pleasure. My mom would always buy me a Mother's Day card and include a check for me to get something special. While I no longer get a card from my mom and I now have even stopped giving my mom a card, I have tried to continue that tradition by giving my own daughter a gift on Mother's Day too. (Shhhhhh......  Her card and gift is waiting here for Sunday when I get to see her.)

The last Mother's Day that my mom spent with us before she had to go to the nursing home, I remember clearly.  I had everyone over.  My son picked her up and brought her to our house because she could not longer drive.  I bought her a new Debbie Macomber book.  She had loved to read but I suspected she only now would look at the cover of the books.  My mom opened her book and was really excited.  Then she put the book down and about 5 minutes later saw it on the table.  My mom picked it up and asked me if it was a new book. Then she asked me if she could borrow it when I was finished reading it.  I remember telling her that it was her book, that I had given it to her.  She picked it up, hugged it to her chest, and said oh I love Debbie Macomber.  Then my mom put it back down on the table.  You can guess what happened about five more times.  After about 5 minutes, she would pick it up and be so excited at seeing the new book.  I would tell her it was hers. She would hug it and put it down.  I finally moved the book and put it in another room.  My mom never saw it or asked about it after that. 

I would love to say that she took it home and read it, then passed it to me, as we often shared new books.  However, by the end of that day, I realized sending it home with her would only continue a cycle.  I kept the book and read it.  I placed it on my own bookshelf and then a year ago, I gave it away. 

If you are blessed to have your mom still, if you are blessed to have daughters or daughter in laws with children, wish them a Happy Mother's Day.




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