Traditions of Easter

Any one who has had the pleasure of knowing my mom before Alzheimer's knows that holidays and entertaining were very important to her. When she was nine, her mom died.  She became pseudo mom to her two little brothers who were six and three at the time.  She often told me stories of trying to be the homemaker of the household.  She even had to learn how to do laundry, one time getting her arm almost caught in the roller of the old wringer washer.  My mom told me about having little food because my grandfather would go out and drink away his paycheck, leaving little for three small children.  Luckily, her grandfather helped out and took care of the kids as best he could. Sometime during her 12th year, she went to live with her Aunt Ann and was able to be just a regular teenage girl.  My mom told me once that it was her Aunt Ann that taught her everything!  Not only did she teacher 'everything' but she took her to church and that is where my mom developed her love of holidays!

My first Easter!  1962 Uncle brought me a bunny!

As the years went by, my mom helped me color eggs, she made me Easter baskets, and hid Easter eggs.  She and I would go to Easter Sunday Mass and then she would put the finishing touches on dinner.  We always had the same foods every Easter.  Ham, potato salad, macaroni salad, fresh kielbasa, marshmallow salad, pickled eggs, and cut up carrots, celery, and green onions.  I have no memory of desserts until my own children came along when I would provide a dessert for dinner.

My 2nd Easter! 1963 All ready for church!

My mom made every holiday special! There would be traditional foods and new clothes!  She and I attended church for many years together.  I can remember times when she would use bobby pins and pin tissues to my head because I didn't have hat to wear in church.

Mom made anyone who came to her house for Easter a special Easter basket. For many years she would invite my in-laws or my niece and nephews.  She would have special wrapped presents for everyone. As we all got older, I started to ask her not to give the kids as much chocolate. She started giving David a fruit basket and then she discovered Rice Krispie treats!  Knowing she just had to make sure we had a bunny in our baskets, she bought Bunny Chocolate molds and used them to make Rice Krispie bunnies, even wrapping them in special plastic wrap with ribbons and bows!

David, Jess (2), and Dave(5)

She only stopped hosting Easter when it became too difficult due to the fact she was exhibiting dementia symptoms and just couldn’t accomplish the necessary tasks any longer.  I started offering to bring more cooked dishes, even offering to make the mashed potatoes for her. Her response to me the second to the last year she made our dinner was that I didn't know how to make mashed potatoes and that they were always too runny!  At the time, I really was hurt and had a hard time with her comment.  Two years later she had no idea she had ever said it because she told me I made the best mashed potatoes.  In hindsight, we know why she said those things and now it doesn't hurt my feelings, it just makes me sad.

Unfortunately, one Easter we went to her house for our designated dinner time, only to find her just getting dressed with no dinner ready. She was just starting to cook and we ended almost two hours for dinner to be ready. This was definitely a sign that something was wrong because my mom had always been the ultimate entertainer and a very thoughtful planner for family holidays. That summer, I convinced her to start coming to my house for holidays.

My mom entered the nursing home in June of 2013.  Since then I have tried to include my mom's traditional food on our table.  However, very few people eat any of them, so I have started eliminating more and more of the dishes each year.  Sadly, two years ago I lost the bunny molds somewhere in my house.  It has taken me the two years to 'get over' the lost bunny molds. This year I bought items to cook my mom's traditional foods, but I didn’t make any.  I figured I was the only one who would eat them anyway, so I took the easy way out. I didn't need to eat a whole bowl of marshmallow salad or a whole ring of kielbasa. I did make my grand children and nephews Easter baskets and probably always will until they are grown!  I had David hide 39 eggs and everyone had fun helping the little ones look for them.

It was a great day, except for the waves of moments when I missed my mom and felt guilty for not visiting her on Easter.  Just at the right moment though, my father in law made my day.  As soon as I brought out the Rice Krispie squares, his eyes opened wide!  He announced that they were tradition!  He always remembered my mother making them!  He didn't say "bunnies"!  I guess if I don't find the bunny molds, Easter can still happen as long as we have Rice Krispie squares!!